When the Backlog Is Full
Maybe the real win isn’t in finishing everything, but in understanding my own limits, and honoring them.
There are moments in life when you sit quietly and ask yourself—Who am I, really?
You might think you know the answer. Especially if you consider yourself self-aware. Especially if you’re used to doing the work, reading the books, having the tough conversations with yourself.
But here’s something I’ve learned, sometimes the hard way: real self-awareness doesn’t just live in your mind. It lives in your relationships too. In how the people closest to you experience you. In the spaces where good intentions collide with real consequences.
Sometimes, you think you’re listening, you think you’re showing up, you think you’re doing everything right—but are you really? What’s the quiet chatter around you? What’s left unsaid by the people who love you the most?
It’s easy to keep up appearances. Easier than we like to admit. But the truth? The people who truly care about you—the ones who hurt when you don’t show up the way they need—they often make excuses for you. They give you grace. They forgive the small hurts. They patch over the cracks you don’t even know are there.
Maybe they tried to tell you once. Maybe they didn’t. Maybe they figured it wasn’t worth the fight, because deep down, they still believe in you. They believe you’re capable of better.
And that’s the thing—sometimes love shows up as patience. But patience doesn’t mean the hurt disappears.
It makes me wonder: when is enough, enough? When is it okay to finally speak up? When do you stop making excuses—for yourself or for others—and start asking the real questions?
Jefferson Fisher, in his reflections on communication, said it best: “The goal is to be heard, not to win.” Because when you set out to win an argument, you almost always lose something bigger: connection. Trust. Respect. And it’s not just in personal life. You see it unfold in careers too. It’s easy to think that success comes from beating others, from proving yourself louder, faster, sharper. But if every step forward leaves someone else crushed underneath—you haven’t won. You’ve just become a different kind of small.
Over the years, I’ve come to realize: The real victories? They happen when you help someone else succeed. When you pause your own race to lend a hand. When you show up not just for yourself, but for the people you’re building with.
Some of my proudest moments weren’t from hitting KPIs or finishing projects. They were the quiet ones—the times I stayed after a meeting to help a teammate who was stuck. The moments I chose encouragement over competition. Those are the moments that stay with you. Those are the ones that matter.
Maybe that’s what Just Another Day is really about—the small choices that quietly add up. The ordinary actions that turn into extraordinary growth.
So here’s a thought for today, from me to you: Ask someone how they actually want to be loved. Ask your friend, your manager, your teammate: “How can I really help?”
Because help isn’t about what you think they need. It’s about what they actually need. And often, all it takes to know the difference is the courage to ask—and the humility to listen.
Not to fix. Not to defend. Just to understand.
Because the more we understand each other, the more we turn just another day into something extraordinary.
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