Just Be Kind

There’s this line that’s stuck with me: “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” I first heard it in the movie Wonder, a film that, like Life Itself, got me to shed a tear or two. You know, the kind of story that doesn’t just entertain you, but quietly sits with you after the credits roll. Sadly, those kinds of movies feel rare these days. Most things feel like noise, loud, fast, and forgettable. The stories that hold mirrors to our lives? They seem to be taking a backseat.

Maybe that’s why we have to write our own stories now. Maybe that’s what I’m trying to do here.

This one’s about kindness.

The kind of kindness that isn’t performative. The one that understands, not everything is visible. That we’re all holding onto something. That just because someone seems fine doesn’t mean they aren’t breaking a little inside.

I’ve been thinking about this lately. How quick we are to say “they didn’t call,” “they don’t check in,” “they’ve changed.” But maybe they’re just overwhelmed. Maybe they’re showing up in the only way they know how. Just like you are. Just like I am.

Because life? It’s a lot. Juggling jobs, responsibilities, ambition, friendships, families… it’s not easy. And nobody really tells you how much work it takes to keep relationships alive. Not just romantic ones, but all of them. Maintaining connection in a world that constantly pulls you in different directions? That’s no small feat.

And yet, we still try.

We try to be a good friend. A good sibling. A good teammate. And sometimes we fail at it. Not because we don’t care, but because we’re stretched thin, trying to hold it all together.

I’ve been on both sides. The one who forgot to call. And the one who felt forgotten.

And I’m learning, not everyone needs to be called every week. Sometimes what matters is the quality of the moment, not the frequency. Some of my closest people are the ones I don’t speak to for months, yet when we finally talk, it’s like no time has passed. There’s joy, laughter, and no guilt. That’s grace. And I’m grateful for that kind of grace.

But let’s be real, there are also people who make you feel bad for not showing up enough. Who measure care in check-ins and texts. And I get it. Maybe they’re hurting too. Maybe they just want to be seen. Maybe they’re hoping you’ll ask the right question at the right time.

And you know what? Maybe we should.

Not in that robotic, “Hey, how are you?” way. But in the real, “Hey… how are you?” kind of way. The one where we’re actually ready to listen to the answer. Even if it’s messy. Even if it’s quiet.

Jefferson Fisher once said, “Seek to be heard, not to win.” I think about that a lot. Because in this world of hot takes and constant opinions, sometimes the kindest thing you can do is really listen. Not to respond. Not to fix. Just to be there.

And while we’re at it, we should also remember to be kind to ourselves.

Honestly, that might be the hardest part. I’ve spent a good part of the past year realizing how unkind I can be to myself. The internal dialogue, the constant comparisons, the “you should have done better.” It’s exhausting.

But the moment I started changing that voice, even slightly, something shifted. I began to feel closer to the version of me I want to be. The one who isn’t trying to win at life, but live it with meaning. The one who understands that everyone has their own path. Their own timing. Their own definition of success.

You want to be fulfilled? Sure. Happy? Of course. But the route there isn’t a straight line. And whatever “top” you’re chasing, just know, there’s another one after that. And another after that. So don’t lose yourself in the climb.

Maybe, just maybe, this is the reminder we all need:

It’s not always about how often you show up, it’s how you show up.

And when people don’t show up the way you want, don’t assume the worst.

Ask. Listen. Give grace.

Because everyone’s fighting something.

I wasn’t planning to write this. But sometimes the things that need to be said show up uninvited. Just like last week post, delivering more. Which I wasn’t thinking about writing, but it came to mind while writing a draft for this. So, this was supposed to be last week post.

And if you’ve read this far, here’s one last thing I’ll leave you with:

If you want to really see someone, look again. And if you still can’t? Ask.

Just another day… but maybe a reminder that kindness still counts.

If you have a minute. Kindly, drop your thoughts and experience on Just Another Day - Substack